September 2011
1 post
August 2011
7 posts
2 tags
Sal (age 10) Henry (age 7) and Me (age 33) Watch...
Henry: What the heck? They're kissing on the beach saying "don't go"? What is this? The end of the movie?
Henry: What the heck? Is that Elvis?
Henry: What the heck is with this cartoon? What are hooties? Is that another word for hooters?
Henry: Are those guys the jackasses in this movie? Yeah, I think these guys are the jackasses.
Henry: Elvis smokes?
Me: Isn't Elvis. It's John Travolta.
Sal: His eyes are too small for his nose. Who is THAT?
Me: Stockard Channing.
Sal: She does NOT look like she'd be in High School.
Henry: Please tell me no one dressed or walked like this in real life. I don't think the Elvis looking guy knows his blondie girl is at this school.
Henry: Did he just put a frog in her purse?
Me: You were right about those guys.
Henry: they are the jackass badasses, is Elvis one of those guys?
Sal: Yeah.
Henry: Do they just sit at the football practice and and make fun of everyone?
Me: Yeah.
Sal: I don't like these people. They're all rude.
Me: Sandy doesn't seem rude.
Sal: So?
Henry: I love this movie. Wait ARE THEY ALL JUST SINGING?!?! SUDDENLY!?
Me: Yeah. that's what happens in High School.
Henry: Seriously? Did this just suddenly happen?? He's singing about her and she's singing about him? Weird. They both don't know they're in the same school?? You can tell that crazy girl is lip syncing. You can tell they're all lip syncing.
Sal: The 50's look stupid. Elvis has a crazy chin dimple.
Henry: Anyone can have a dimple like that, if they take a knife and just carve one out.
Sal: Yeah, I'm sure the principal says "Quiet" and they're all quiet. That doesn't happen.
Henry: WHY IS HE ACTING LIKE THAT TO SANDY?!?!
Me: Why do you think?
Henry: 'Cause he's a jackass.
Me: Henry you can't say that word again, ok..... but yeah.
Henry: Rizzo and these girls Sandy is friends with are the bad girls. Alllright!!!
Sal: This is boring.
Henry: Are they kissing in the car? Oh my god they are licking each other!! CHINESE KISSING!!
Me: Chinese kissing?
Henry: Uh, what is it, Japanese kissing? French... oh yeah french kissing.
(Greased Lightning comes on)
Henry: Too much singing. Can I turn this off?
Beatrix walks in: Oh look at all the princesses dancing!
Sal: Those cars don't look fast, they look like hippos.
Henry: OH MY GOD LOOK AT SANDY SHE'S A BAD GIRL NOW!
Sal: Those pants.
Henry: Grandad and I went on the Gravitron 2 times last week.
Me: You did not!
Henry: Yeah, twice, I puked.
Me: YOU DID NOT TAKE MY DAD ON THE GRAVITRON TWICE!
Henry: I did. See that one ride in the movie? It looks so boring, it must be a 'kissing ride', the kind you go on just to kiss people?
Me: Chinese Kiss them?
Henry: Har-Har. Green screen car flying into the SKY!!!!!
5 tags
L'ete en Rose: Shark week →
leteenrose:
Clearly I missed the contract that everyone else seems to have signed at birth obligating them to a lifetime of devotion and free publicity for Shark Week.
What’s the deal? Why are we celebrating an animal that can’t be domesticated and kept as a pet because all it wants to do is rip humans limb…
July 2011
27 posts
Man dies after 19 black widow spider bites →
I’m going to have nightmares
Man dies after 19 black widow spider bites →
I’m actually going to have nightmares from this
Crabs
For the most part, this past week has been really fun. I was “beachin’ it,” as I like to say. My cousins definitely know how to strike a nerve though, and, thanks to the younger one, there are now hermit crabs roaming around my front yard. I hate hermit crabs.
Yes, I still get overly excited when my parents tell me, “Sure honey, you can go downstairs and finish watching the movie.” EFFF YYYEEEESSSSSSSS
This Blog
This Blog is completely random. I don’t know why, but it is. As a somewhat young person, I think it’s okay to have a pointless blog. Yet, someday, I think I will create a blog with a point. And it will be beautiful, and lovely, and… Pointed?
“Seriously Benjamin? #getinmypants Yes, I do use hashtags all the time. Why would...”
– My Mind
My Brother's Type of Humor
Mike: No no no no, I have to visit my grandmother!
Harvey: Is she dying?
Mike: No.
Harvey: Cancel on her.
“Hi, it’s Mary. Can I talk to my dad please? My mom won’t talk to me.”
Boys Boys Boys
Friend: Haha thanks [Not Your Average Giraffe Tongue]. Guys just suck sometimes, you know?
Me: Yeah [...] boys are dumb, stupid, and think through their [special parts]. Or so I've heard...
“I bet those stereotype makers didn’t expect me to play air guitar on my...”
– twitter
“Singing into a hairbrush is a teenage stereotype that I indulge in quite often.”
– twitter
The Alot Is Better Than You At Everything →
tumblr
I’m new to this, but it’s pretty cool so far. Shannon and I are having a lot of fun with the fingers crossed song on all of the previews. It’s so catchy, we even made a video of us dancing to it. Shannon (creator of oye with the poodles) is having trouble picking a theme she likes. I should go help her out some more. She helped me decide on a name, after all.
Not so random...
“Ambitions in life: To make some man’s life miserable.”
– Toddlers and Tiaras